Not Feeling It

I’ve been home for exactly 2 weeks. They have been an astonishing time. I won’t say we’ve had a perfect time because we haven’t. She hasn’t upset me or even remotely frustrated me, but I’m fairly certain I did that to her at least once. But we made it through and nobody had their feelings hurt. That, in and of itself, is a pretty cool accomplishment.

There have been exact 2 times that I can point at that I find very impressive. Within the last 7 days I have made an obvious overture for nookage twice only to be rebuffed. In yon times ago, My Bride would have said something along the lines of, Maybe later or Not right now and, what I always assumed, try and put it off hoping I’d forget about it. That might be wrong, but that’s how I had always interpreted it.

I took of my highly fashionable (seriously) glasses and set them aside. I approached My Bride, very smoofly (misspelled on purpose), sat beside her and began a very elaborate move. Yeah, I’m not feelin’ it right now were her exact words. I leaned over and kissed her on the head and told her ok. I popped up and re-acquired my rightful place on the couch.

That was it.

The next day, I was richly awarded with hot nookie.

A very similar incident occurred this evening. I made a highly overt approach to her. Engaged in a obvious attempt at scoring a love-making session. As we pecked around, I’m not feeling very sexual tonight. I put on my glasses and resumed my sewing.

In the past, both of those encounters would have sent me over the edge into a rage-filled incredibly pissed off rant about never getting any sex.

Not anymore

I understand she has needs and sometimes one of those needs is to NOT have sex.

Some readers may not understand how big a step that is for me, the sex addict. The guy who, just over a month ago, thought he would never be able to survive without jerking off at least once a month. Now I’m totally cool with My Bride saying, “Not tonight dear, I’m not feeling it.”

It’s possible that us not having sexual relations for 6 months might have something to do with my attitude adjustment (it does). I’m just excited that I’m where I’m at.

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About MyJourney

I'm a 41 year old married father of 3. I am a sex addict. This blog is to document my progress, recovery and marital growth. Pornography is an evil creation. Let my experiences serve as a warning to all.
This entry was posted in Marriage Issues, Relationship, Sex, Sex Addiction and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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