Confusing Times

I’ve lived my entire life with my head buried in the sands of selfishness. I was told to be selfless and serve My Bride, which I agree with. Then I’m told to put recovery as my #1 priority. That seems incredibly selfish.

I know recovery will lead me to be a better husband and father. I also know that if I don’t fight for my marriage, I’ll lose it and there will be an enormous hole in my heart.

I know, cognitively, that recovery is supposed to come first. That’s what The Good Doctor, former therapist, said anyway. I also know that I’m the cause of my marriage falling apart. My heart says I have to serve My Bride and children first.

I desperately want to put my full effort into both.

Recovery literature says “half measures avail us nothing.” I don’t want to put half effort into any of the things I’m working on. I want recovery and I want my marriage to flourish.

I live in confusing times.

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About MyJourney

I'm a 41 year old married father of 3. I am a sex addict. This blog is to document my progress, recovery and marital growth. Pornography is an evil creation. Let my experiences serve as a warning to all.
This entry was posted in Healing, Marriage Issues, Progress, Recovery, Sex Addiction and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Confusing Times

  1. onehelpmate says:

    I believe putting your recovery first is the best way to serve your family… It is kind of like the oxygen masks on an airplane… Put your own mask on first, then the mask of your child… If you can’t breath, you can’t make sure your child can… If you are not emotionally healthy… It is hard to help your family…

    You can do it with Gods help:)

  2. Yes, that is a GREAT analogy. She is correct brother. God first, recovery second (for now), relationship with wife 3rd and the kids 4th. You have come a long way..do not let let the enemy twist the priorities.

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