Everything went to hell at the same time. I took a nose-dive into depression. My marriage went to shit. I stopped talking to God.
They all happened when I stopped working my program.
Not a damn chance.
I’ve been told by several people that the best thing I can do for her is to work my program. Place your marriage below your recovery and it WILL work out.
I have a very hard time accepting that.
I fucked my marriage up. How could I, in good consciousness, neglect my marriage and focus on me? My selfishness is what brought is to this point. So I fix it by being selfish?
I fail to see the logic.
Our marriage therapist
My support group
My blog comments
They all tell me to work my program and forget about my marriage.
Do they not realize that my marriage is the single most important thing in my life? It’s the only place I have ever felt safe. If I’m scared I go to my wife. If I am nervous I go to her. If I am upset, angry, fed up…I always go to my wife. Now I’m supposed to discontinue that? I’m supposed to take those things to my brothers?
I guess I just need someone to explain it to me. I am capable of having an open mind. I just need to see some sort of logic and I can understand and follow. Without it, there’s no way for me to do it.