What I Needed

We talked for a long time. I shared and she listened. My Bride listened to everything I had to say. This is one of her greatest attributes, to listen to what is being said. Rarely does she interrupt. My Bride gives her full attention to whomever speaks to her. To top it off, she has thoughtful responses or commentary.

My Bride is beginning to learn how to handle her depressed husband. When to coddle, when to crack down and when to encourage. It has to be difficult, learning this skill as she tries to recover from the pain I’ve induced.

My Bride is an incredibly special woman. She has all the things a man could want: intelligence, humor, a quick wit, sarcasm, problem solving, she listens, she gives appropriate advice, calm, kind, nurturing, sacrificing and beauty. There’s a ton more, but you get the point. It’s incredible how she does not realize how special she is. Humble needs to be added to that list. She’s the most humble person you could ever hope to meet.

I had a pretty major melt-down during our conversation. She listened as I buried myself. ‘I am a terrible person’ was what I was giving her. Annnnd I gave her a lengthy list to support my self-condemnation.

She patiently and kindly listened. When I would stop, she would tell me how nobody else views me the way I do. She tried incredibly hard to lift me up. I wouldn’t let her. I’m really good at that.

Just a few moments ago we lay upon our bed. We snuggled close and embraced one another. I put my hand on her back and she ran her fingers through my hair.

I cried.

She stroked my head and looked into my eyes.

I cried more.

Why are you crying?
“You’re giving me something I’ve desperately wanted for a long time.”

She nodded, smiled and continued.


She gave freely and lovingly. What I needed most when I needed it.

About MyJourney

I'm a 41 year old married father of 3. I am a sex addict. This blog is to document my progress, recovery and marital growth. Pornography is an evil creation. Let my experiences serve as a warning to all.
This entry was posted in emotion, Marriage Issues, Progress, Recovery, Sex, Sex Addiction and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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