Man, Woman, God

It’s been a week.

That’s how my morning started. One week ago I admitted EVERYTHING to her.
Dude, I mean everything.
The whole enchilada.
The entire, awful truth. I’m out of clichés

Last Saturday and Sunday sucked for both of us. It was way harder on her though.

She stared this thought track:
It’s been a week
Saturday and Sunday were crazy hard
Monday was like a new beginning

Monday WAS a new beginning. We truly have started over. I have made deliberate efforts at starting a new life.
Responsible
Trustful
Honest
Dependable

When this is all over I would like to do something special she said as she felt where my ring used to live. I miss feeling your ring there she ran her finger over the dent. Maybe get a tattoo right here.

We have been through counseling before. Several years ago, we went to a pastoral couple at a church we were loosely associated with. Some things got better. Most did not. I took 1 thing from that experience.20131123-132431.jpg
The closer we get to God, the closer we get together.

I never did anything about it.
I am a changed man this time.

Spirituality will be a part of our relationship.

There have been times that I would tell her what we were going to do. We’re going out tonight. We’re doing this…
She doesn’t exactly like it when I do that. And by doesn’t like it, I mean she hates it and lets me know it.

2 days ago I announced that God will be a part of our healing process. This is something we will be doing.
:::I said that remembering she hates it:::

Interestingly enough, she didn’t object. I announced we were going to church (we haven’t been in 2 years). Where shall we go?

Good start, man. Keep it up!!

It’s been a week…
She started something very special this week. She sends me songs. Songs that describe her feelings. Songs that tell me what she’s thinking. It’s a very neat thing and it means a lot to me.

We exchanged songs this morning.
My song brought a tear to her eye. You are so beautiful to me
It’s perfect in describing her.

You are so beautiful to me
You are so beautiful to me
Can’t you see
Your everything I hoped for
Your everything I need
You are so beautiful to me

Such joy and happiness you bring
Such joy and happiness you bring
Like a dream
A guiding light that shines in the night
Heavens gift to me
You are so beautiful to me

Perfect.
I told her that she is beautiful and that I wasn’t talking about her, stunning, looks. It’s her heart and her mind.

She is everything that I want to be.

Her song put me in tears.
I will not cry my mind thought. I struggled. I fought. I almost made it to the chorus.
:::Tears flowing:::
It’s not sadness.
I am so incredibly happy.
I am so grateful for this opportunity.

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About MyJourney

I'm a 41 year old married father of 3. I am a sex addict. This blog is to document my progress, recovery and marital growth. Pornography is an evil creation. Let my experiences serve as a warning to all.
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2 Responses to Man, Woman, God

  1. jeglatter says:

    🙂 that you for sharing. Nothing is more beautiful than open hearts!
    -Jennifer

  2. chipgruver says:

    One of the things no one eve tells you about repentance is how much joy there is on the other side. So good to hear you are going to church. Be sure it is a church that fits you. If mom goes to church, there is a small chance dad will. If dad goes to church, there is a major chance (like 90% chance) that mom will. -Chip

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